Writings of a Sinner

For all sin and fall short of the glory of God

If I were to say…

If I were to say “Goodnight” to your “good night”, would it change your mind?

Would you welcome my kisses like the sunrise?

Would you let me fall into love through a bluesky?

Could I cover and protect you like a rainfly?

When I say “goodnight” to your “good night”.



Am I allowed to ache to feel you wrapped up inside my embrace? 

Am I allowed to trap you in my arms like a fly caught in a web?

Am I allowed to send whispered love letters to your in acknowledging ears?

Am I allowed to tell you that I miss you even if you don’t say anything back? 

Am I allowed to let your silence break me? 

Am I allowed to let myself fall asleep early instead of waiting for a response that’s short and vague?

Would that be ok? 

Do I have your permission?

Am I allowed to miss you?

The things I’d tell you.

Oh boy, you’re a wild one. 

Your love is so blazingly hot that it’s corrosive.

You do not see the damage you deal until it’s done.

Fix fix fix until you can no longer lift the tools and you neglect yourself. 

If you asked me for advice, these are the things I’d tell you. 

Take a deep breath. 

You are of no use broken.

Stand up straight, but talk softer. 

 Love slower… If you can. 


A bird’s beauty is in their freedom, not their flight. 


I’ve forgotten the way it feels to hold on so tight you break. 

I don’t remember the addicting annoyance of long strands of her hair tickling my neck. 

I was reminded of the sensation of hot breath against my lips. 

I can no longer taste the salt of skin. 

There’s a hint of perfume on my bible. 

Sand slips through my fingers and I can no longer grasp the things I’ve forgotten. 



Vision blurs


Fire splits the sky from your maw. 


Claws dig into the soil. 


Muscles tense and launch you to destruction. 


You crash through. Concrete turns to dust. 


Lifeblood leaks from the cracks in your skin. 


Lights fade. 






The Words we Whisper

The words we whisper write a story that we wish we could tell with a full voice. 

Sweet tunes of truth harmonize in the quiet of empty halls, bouncing their song off of acoustic walls. 

The words we whisper lead us behind shut doors to find both dust and beauty hiding away. 

Would you like a secret? It costs only a minute of your time and an ounce of your trust. 

The words we whisper will warm one’s heart while breaking another into ever dazzling shards. 

Precious like diamonds, they dance on the floor as they slip through your fingers. 

The words we whisper hold more power than the words we shout…

Because the words we whisper, don’t always come out. 

I can’t look away

I can’t close my eyes and shut out the scene that I don’t wish to see. 

It’s there. It’s happening and I know of it’s existence. 

I can’t look away and ignore the sight of my mirror’s betrayal. 

The downfall is painfully present and is shaming the night. 

I can’t fall asleep and not think about how I’m not needed. 

I felt the footsteps coming before the ground could tell me the same. 


Tiptoeing on a tightrope I’m trembling to tell you that I’m still trying. 

Broken on words that bust and bruise and bleed me dry of any bravery. 

Eyelids indecisive between easy sleeping and the effortless eating of hours. 

Honesty hurts harder than the hand that harms my hastily forsaken heart. 

Too close 

I almost lost it all today. I almost lost it all. 

I came so close to to the breaking point. So close to a terrible fall. 

A quake shook my heart today. Your portrait is still firm against its wall. 

I almost lost my heart today. I almost lost it all. 


I am a trap. 

A cunning and terrible trap. 

Sometimes I even catch myself. 

But it’s always too late. 

I’m afraid that you’re caught. 

That I cannot let you go. 

You’re better off free. 

You’re better off gone. 

Without knowing me.