Writings of a Sinner

For all sin and fall short of the glory of God

Month: November, 2012

Faith and Patience

LORD have mercy on me

I come to you weary as your servant

Your work fills me with joy and passion as I see your hand in my daily life

Please LORD give me patience and faith in your will that I may live each day according to it

Build me in your light and renew me with your vigor

I do not know where my path leads but I follow it willingly

Strengthen my heart and my feet as they follow where you lead

I truly desire your will

LORD have mercy on me

 

Dirty Town

I need out of this dirty town.

Out of this city that’s dragged my down to my knees more times than I can count.

Restless by day and restless by night.

It lingers in my dreams out of pure hatred and spite.

Its a kick in the gut when trying to climb out of it’s rut.

Because this city wants my soul.

Things like hope, love, and success dangle before my eyes, but they’re just carrots tied to a stick and this mule is tired.

So don’t tell me to wait just a little bit longer or tell me what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.

You’re wrong.

I’m dying which makes you to be lying.

I know you want what’s best but I’m tired of this mess.

Cant you see me pound my chest and hear the roar from inside it.

I cant mask it.

I can’t hide it.

Nor will I let time bide it.

So from now on I’m pointed up and out.

I’m sure and without doubt I’m not sticking around.

I am getting out of this dirty town.

Wait it Out

Everybody wants to be written in a love song

To be truly accepted for right and for wrong

Everyone wants to be painted in a poem

To have someone describe and prove that they know them

We all want to be somebody’s valentine

To be the reason we see the other smile all the time

I can’t be the only love song writer

I can’t be the only loneliness fighter

I can’t be the only one with a crush

The only one craving another heart’s touch

Am I the only fool looking for someone to hold

Someone to help me keep out and drive away the cold

Just looking for a woman to keep me steady and grounded

Because my demons have me tired, outnumbered, and surrounded

I constantly search and try to coax a smile

but it’d be nice to be chased every once in a while.

They say, “You’re still young.”

But still my bell has been rung

My youth doesn’t change my hearts hunger for love

I’m still just one waiting for the second dove

So I daily pray for an end to this bitter drought

I guess I have no other choice but to wait it out

Indulge Me

I used to try and make you laugh.
I used to talk with a little honey on my tongue.
Your face would brighten and it would make my day, but no longer.
Indulge me.

I’d think for ten minutes for five seconds of speech.
I’d wait all day for just a few minutes of your time.
I could tell you loved it too, but no longer.
indulge me.

There was a twinkle in my eye.
The moon was a little brighter.
I could jump a little higher.
My nights were filled with feelings of Love.
Hope.
Passion.
Warmth.
Excitement, but no longer.
Indulge me.

And now I even live in your town.
And now I even have free time.
And before I used to chase you, but no longer.
Indulge me.

Truth

I’m gonna go crazy.

I’m gonna explode.

One day all the thoughts in my mind are finally going to line up and paint the canvas.

There’s gonna be a lot at stake.

My pride.

Rejection by the ones I love.

Failure.

All I can do is pray that I don’t get crushed.

Once I let it out there will be nothing on the inside supporting the columns  of my heart I’ve been building since the last break.

Columns made of stone.

Even stone can erode.

Because not everything written by the heart is a poem.

Not everything breathed from the lungs is song.

Life is not a journey for all.

Life is a constant battle and death is a just a sign that either you’ve won or you’ve lost.

Nobody can win alone.

You can throw your trust into worldly ideas that man is just an animal.

You can give your soul to the high of alcohol and narcotics.

These “allies” may be vast in number and seemingly infinite in strength but they are just beggars waiting to be thieves.

Just beautiful faces covering an ugly beast that you will be chained to.

Everything it destroys will also be your doing because its chains are unbreakable.

Except to one.

The same ally that can free you of your earthly chains is the same and only one who can win you the war.

You don’t even have to ask.

You have only to believe in his grace, love, and power.

People say that putting faith in this Him is too much.

It is too difficult.

But it is indeed more difficult to resist the truth than it is to believe it.

This truth destroys all fear of the war’s end.

This truth turns life into a journey.

A journey I eagerly take.